Confessions: I’m A Webcam Girl
By Vallene Henderson
Please note, Readers discretion is advised due to strong suggestive language and images.
OMG! I couldn’t believe it! Why would someone do this? What would people think!?!?!
This is what was going thru my head while I was watching a video of myself popping my pussy on my webcam. My friend told me this was on the web and I had to see it for myself…….
Three years ago I got laid off and was still dealing with my divorce. I was bored and needed to keep my mind off of things. I found myself surfing the net and chatting in the popular chat rooms like Yahoo Chat. Though the chats I would meet people and cultivate friendships. After chatting and meeting different people I really grew tired of having to physically meet people but I still wanted to get a connection with them. While going on the chats, I was hearing buzz about this new video chat application where you can watch people without their consent. Usually on yahoo you have to get invited or get someones permission to view their webcam. But with this new application your webcam was open for all to see. By downloading this app I did not know that it will start me off to a whole new world.
Before this lifestyle, I was this “vanilla” girl who had a great career and was perceived by everyone as a morally sound wholesome young lady. But little did they know I was an undercover freak. I liked to get frisky and fulfill my hoe-ish ways. I just did not want other people to know this side of me.
When I first started using the application and chatting I was a good girl. All I really did was chat and smile on camera. I didn’t take off my clothes off or do anything suggestive. But there is a sexual undertone within the chat world. You get desensitized of sex because of this and your online morals begin to change. There would be about 100 men asking me to take of my shirt or play with my pussy, and I would just smile and laugh while I see them jerk their dicks. After a while this gets boring. And I find myself not being entertained. One particular nite I was at home drinking wine and smoking a joint. I was feeling horny and frisky and decided to open my webcam. I was playing with my pussy and putting on a show. That was my first show…..I remember the first hour it was fun, I was getting so much attention. I noticed about 3-4hrs later I had 500 men watching me. All those men watching me, requesting me to do things, and responding to me by jerking off, was really an intoxicating feeling. This fueled me to keep going and performing. I wound up being online streaming for about 6hrs. The next day there was a buzz in the video chat community about my performance. Having props like dildos, apples vibrators was the talk of the town. The people that knew me were shocked but surprisingly they didn’t judge me.
I was on an ego trip from show that it became addicting. For the next 2 weeks I continued to do the things that I enjoyed in my private time. The more people that watched me the more I performed. I Then noticed that there were certain people consistently watching me. So I would give them special attention. Me being naïve, I thought that all this would stay within the video chat community until that ONE day……
Unbeknownst to me, while I was performing on camera someone was recording me and then posted the video to an adult file sharing website. I was so devastated that this had happened. At no point did I consider anyone outside of the community would see this. I was crying and going crazy. My friend Sara really put things into perspective, she told me “every time you open your camera you run the risk of being recorded. So you cant get upset if someone takes your image and posts it somewhere. That is the risk you take opening your camera.” I never looked at it like that and I had to admit she was right.
At this time I had a reputation of the party/ show girl that likes to pop her pussy and have fun on camera. I was so scared at what my family, former co-workers, trainees and friends would have to say about me doing this I stopped. A month goes by and I was chatting with one of my friends I haven’t spoken to in a while. I told her what I was going through and she really gave me great advice.
After speaking to her I called up the site and told them that I was under 18 years of age at the time the video was taken. They were so scared of a lawsuit that they immediately took the video down. I was so relieved it was like a mountain was lifted off my shoulders.
Do you know when you do something bad, and you pray to God and tell him, “If you get me out of this I will be in church every Sunday,” well that was me! Because not to long after that video was down I was back to my old ways again. It didn’t take long til I was back to performing in front of the camera. A couple of months went by and low and behold I was recorded again. But this time I was up on several sites. I was on xhamster, pornhub, xtubes, Rude and other sites where they charge people to view their content. Now when I saw this, and saw how someone was making money off of me doing something that I enjoyed doing for free, a light bulb went off inside my head. If I can make money off of this then why am I not doing it?!?! and that is how I started on this path.
I hooked up with other virtual friends that I met whom are like me and we decided to take this to another level. We started our own chat group and would get about 1500-2000 viewers a night. At the time we thought is was awesome. These 2000 people wanted to see us, and we had fun with it. After awhile they wanted private sessions with us. And that is where the money came in and we started our hustle. Here is the breakdown, to come into our video chatroom we asked for a $10 donation. And we usually had about 1000+ viewers. Then there were guys that wanted to chat with us privately. We would request a $50 hourly donation and would have about 5-10 daily private chats, now you do the math. To make more money we began recruiting other girls, we tackled all the social media platforms such as Twitter, Facebook and Myspace, and we created a social club. At this time we didn’t care about the consequences, we already had our image out there, and we also have been recorded; we felt that the worse has already happened. My club had about 20-25 girls. This was better then being a stripper and safe because you didn’t have to touch these guys and you were in the comfort of your own home.
After about a year, there was a slight strain to being enthralled in the web-world. You technically don’t have a “real” life. You are constantly at home in front of the camera. When your real world friends are having fun hanging out on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday night partying, we were inside getting drunk and stripping and putting on shows in front of the camera. It does take a toll on you. So after 2 yrs of going hard with the cam, the girls dwindled and my partner got diagnosed with cancer. I then decided to end our site and just market myself and be a headliner for various other sites since I accumulated a solid following and fan base.
Wow, who would have thought this side of the adult industry was lucrative. Speaking to you it seems like you really enjoy what you do. I am a person that doesn’t like to knock anyone else hustle, but have you experienced any downside to this lifestyle?
The downside of being a Web-Cam Girl is the tremendous amount of time you spend on the cam, it causes the world to pass you by. The clients can be so demanding of your time that you find yourself being online for 14-20 hrs a day. Sometimes you don’t realize that you did not eat or even leave the house. And while you are in the house the real world is moving without you. I have gotten to the point where I have to force myself to close my laptop and leave it alone and have ‘ME’ time.
Have you gotten any backlash from anyone?
I’ve been fortunate and haven’t really gotten serious backlash. Two of my brother’s friends would send me links to sites saying “guess who this is” but nothing serious. I’m prepared for anything because I don’t care.
Has anyone in your vanilla world see on cam? What was the reaction of your friends & family?
Yes, people in that world have seen me. But I was preemptive with my family. I sat them down and opened my laptop and was like “look…this is what I do, I don’t want you to be in the street trying to defend my honor because one of your boys saw me pop my pussy or sucked a dick on camera.” they were shocked but they were like, “if this is what you are going to do at least you are safe and you better make sure you get paid for doing this and not for chump change.” I’m close to my brothers and they have my back no matter what I do. I know my family was hurt when I told them. But I am so happy they are supportive.
I did have some old co-workers reach out to me saying “OMG”, but I tell them I am the same person. My online life it the other side that I could not expose at the time due to my career. I’m just doing something I want to do and making great money doing.
If this never happen where do you think you would be?
I would be in corporate America as a director of some training & development department. Based on my resume I could get a job tomorrow. So worse case scenario if this doesn’t work out as least I tried. Before I settle down and have a family at least I can check this lifestyle off my bucket list lol
What did you do before Webcam?
I was a technical designer instructor for software development. So I was the one instructing assistants all the way up to the people that sat in the boardroom at companies such as Verizon, Cablevision, Microsoft, etc.
What other ventures have you gotten into from Web-cam?
I would do things that other girls weren’t doing and charge good donations. I would do theme rooms such as girl on girl, shower cams, dick sucking or squirting contest. And of course, having sex on cam. But my newest venture that I am really looking to pursue is porn. My clients keep telling me that they would pay top dollar to buy one of my porn videos. So I am actively pursuing that journey.
Have you done any yet?
I have one scene under my belt. I have a huge personal collection by but not professional.
So you want to have a family in the future, how would you respond to your daughter coming to you saying she wants to do web-cam, or something like it.?
I know I would not want this for my daughter but she has to live her own life. I would not encourage it but I would not frown upon it. Of course I wouldn’t want her sucking dicks and fucking everyone. But I cant stop it because this is her life and she will do what she will do.
So you don’t see yourself stopping any time soon do you?
No no noooo! I am having to much fun and making A LOT of money doing it!
Images courtesy of Google
***If you have a confession LET ME KNOW! email me at vhenderson @ theaudracatalog.com and YOUR confession can be featured ;)